Gratitude

I feel like I have a different outlook on life now.

As we all know, you tend to not appreciate things until they are taken away.

And if you read my last post, you saw the list of rules and rights that were taken away from us while in the hospital.

I missed:

• soft towels & washclothes that were done in my gentle scent-free detergent and dried w/ Downy!!!
• going to the bathroom when I needed to.  Being locked out of the bathroom and having to find someone to open the door to let you in was awful.  Not only that, but it seemed like EVERY time I went in there to sit I would hear someone calling my name for Medicines or Roll Call or a phone call.
• Going outside for fresh air when you wanted to
• Doing my hair and makeup!  And, thus, feeling better about your appearance.
• PRIVACY!!!
• my own bed.  Those beds and pillows were HARD!
• Sleeping in the dark w/ the door closed
• Setting the a/c for the temperature that I find comfortable and easier to breathe.  It was so cotton-pickin' hot and stuffy in there and I was sweating constantly and it was so much harder to breathe.
• Along that line, I missed my ceiling fans!
• clocks and mirrors in my room
• Being able to make a phone call.  Since everyone was long-distance for me, I could not place calls and was totally dependant on people calling in to me.  There were only 4 phones and with 40 women sharing them you can imagine how much those phone were free and my calls could get through!
• Exhaust fan in the bathroom.  For one, after you take a shower it is so steamy in there that I literally couldn't breathe and yet I couldn't open the door until I was "decent."   Also, everyone "pooing"...well, after a while you could smell it out in the hallway from the various rooms since there were no exhaust fans.  Yuck!
• Being able to remove myself from bad language and behavior.  I don't use bad language and I've always avoided being around people who do.  In the hospital there were very coarse and lewd people with a very limited vocabulary, if you get my meaning.  It was so offensive to hear that talk over and over.
• Having control of taking care of my health.  I know better than they what I need and my routine for it.  They lost some of what I needed and I just wasn't getting the care I needed for my CF and my O2 went from 94 at admittance to 87 at the end.

I would have thought that I would have missed things like the computer and my cell phone and my car, but I really didn't give them much thought.  I only missed my cell phone when I needed to contact my CF dr and didn't have the number.  That was VERY frustrating!

It is sad that we have to go without things in order to truly appreciate them.

I trust that this experience has made me a better person.